Children, how time flies - how you prevent your life from running away

You have a lot to do as a mom. Sometimes so much that you think the work grows over your head.

In 2015 the statistical birth rate in Germany was 1.5 children per woman. This is the highest level since 1982.

And actually you would have to do so much more!?

Time is running and running. With good time management, it is hoped that you may be able to get a free time window out. But for what? To plan even more activities?

Is it really what is important to you in life – to press as many projects as possible into your diary?

The low density of children in Germany means that more and more people are insecure and sometimes overwhelmed as soon as they become parents themselves.

How can you really use your time wisely??

Perhaps we will get to the bottom of this riddle if we figure out how our subjective perception of time comes about.

While time passes objectively evenly, we subjectively experience great differences in how we feel about time. Sometimes the time seems to run, sometimes it passes in slow motion. Sometimes we have a good time, sometimes we perceive it as unpleasant.

While time passes objectively evenly, we subjectively experience great differences in how we feel about time. Sometimes the time seems to run, sometimes it passes in slow motion.

Sometimes we have a good time, sometimes we perceive it as unpleasant.

Hardly any girl grew up without the opportunity to casually learn and practice the role of a mother.

It makes a big difference whether we are living through time or looking at it in retrospect.

There was no shortage of opportunities to observe how adults treat infants. The girls naturally fit (why, surely also the boys) on a neighbor baby, their little cousin or their own younger sibling.

Remembered time

Retrospectively, the only thing that matters is the density of experiences, i.e. how many novel, intensive experiences we have had. If there were many such experiences, time seems long and fulfilling. We can also consider unpleasant experiences to be valuable in our memory.

We do not remember details in everyday activities, so that time seems short afterwards.

To begin our motherhood knowledge many of us hardly any of the problems that have always existed when raising children.

This is also the reason why we remember childhood and adolescence – in which we experienced so many things for the first time – as extensive, eventful times, while the years as adults, when we are caught up in our routines, are literally to ourselves seem to rush past.

We all feel that we would rather look back on an intense life full of ups and downs, full of powerful impressions than on uniform years that could hardly leave a trace in our brains. New, formative experiences ensure a more fulfilling, satisfied life.

So try to make room for new experiences.

This also means that we regularly leave our comfort zone, which contains everything we are used to, on a regular basis. Let your imagination run wild: what new experience can you let into your life?

These can be very small steps, e.g. you could try a new cooking recipe, go to an unknown playground, another one way to Take work etc.

Suggestions for more intense experiences: Grab your family and visit friends and acquaintances that you haven’t seen in a very long time. Expand your circle of friends by doing something with friendly, casual acquaintances. Plan a vacation of a different kind than usual. Learn a new language or find a new hobby.

Or more intense experiences: Grab your family and visit friends and acquaintances that you haven’t seen in a long time. Expand your circle of friends by doing something with friendly, casual acquaintances. Plan a vacation of a different kind than usual. Learn a new language or find a new hobby.

This also means that we regularly leave our comfort zone, which contains everything we are used to, on a regular basis. Let your imagination run wild: what new experience can you let into your life?

If you are particularly dissatisfied in one area of life, you can also make yourself feel life again through major, radical changes. Reorient yourself professionally, move or go abroad for a few years. Life means change. Change means life.

You might also like the matching article Mummy life – hamster bike or adventure.

Experience time

Whether we perceive the time we are living as long or short depends on our attention.

Time’s running

If we are highly concentrated on an activity, we do not pay attention to the time. It then flies by.

It can make us feel bad when we are overwhelmed. We have set ourselves more goals than we can realistically create. We are stressed.

But it can also feel very pleasant. This is when we are challenged but can master the tasks well, i.e. are neither under or overwhelmed. We then get into a state that is known as “flow”.

This can happen, for example, when we write a text, play music, sit on a sewing project or play tennis. Since we concentrate entirely on one activity, our perception of ourselves and with it time is reduced.

If my four-year-old daughter played extensively with grandma and grandpa for three hours, she often asks me why I pick her up so early. Time flew by for them. She had a flow experience.

Time doesn’t want to go by

Let’s focus on ourselves, e.g. by paying attention to our body sensations or our emotions, the time feels extended.

That is the reason why time seems very long in highly emotional situations. For example, parents tend to overestimate the time their baby cried.

You may also know the following scenario: You are at home alone with your child. It is early evening and your child is already tired, complaining and irritable. You know it only takes an hour before (hopefully) it will sleep. But time just doesn’t want to go …

In this case, we are not distracted by a demanding job, but simply feel how the situation is stressing us. The time expands.

Also in frightening seconds, for example in a car accident, or in psychological or physical emergency situations, e.g. During the grief for a loved one, with lovesickness, a depression, when we have a high fever or just need to go to the bathroom very urgently, this slow motion effect can occur.

A related phenomenon is boredom. When we suddenly have nothing to do but pay attention to ourselves and our thoughts – for example when we are waiting for a delayed train – the time seems to us to be infinitely long. We are hardly used to this state today because we simply pull out our smartphone to bridge the emptiness that has arisen.

A deliberately used time-out can have very positive effects for us.

Recovery in "slow mode"

If we stop by concentrating on our body, our emotions or our breathing, the time suddenly expands – which can lead to a beneficial relaxation.

This is the principle of yoga, meditation, floating tanks, breathing exercises or mindfulness training.

You can easily try this out by sitting comfortably and just concentrating on your breathing for a few minutes. You will notice that a few minutes seem very long.

Anyone who is very skilled in meditating will be able to extend the perceived time so that they experience almost timelessness.

A similar phenomenon is commonly referred to as "leisure": time that a person can design according to their own and spontaneous wishes.

This allows us to be in the here and now with all our senses without thinking about the future, to take away the freedom to simply live into the day. Time then passes very slowly in a pleasant way.

A similar phenomenon is commonly referred to as "leisure": time that a person can design according to their own and spontaneous wishes. This allows us to be in the here and now with all our senses without thinking about the future, to take away the freedom to simply live into the day. Time then passes very slowly in a pleasant way.

It is worth trying to bring about the pleasant "slow mode", which slows down the stressful everyday life, again and again.

If you get into a conflict with your children that is slowly threatening to escalate, just unleash yourself and empathize with yourself. Pay attention to your body, your emotions and your breathing. So you can relax and act more calmly afterwards.

You can also deliberately interpret boredom positively. If you are standing in a traffic jam or in the supermarket at the checkout, do not be annoyed, but happy. You have the opportunity to practice mindfulness and do something for yourself and your emotional balance.

It is worth trying to bring about the pleasant "slow mode", which slows down the stressful everyday life, again and again.

Examples: ask yourself what mood you are in and how your body feels. Pay attention to your breathing. Be aware of what you see, hear and smell. You could also change your perspective and try to perceive the situation from your child’s perspective.

What kind of time perception is preferable for a balanced life? Should we strive for time to go quickly or rather slowly?

What kind of time perception is preferable for a balanced life? Should we strive to make time go fast or slow? The answer is: both. We need phases in which we work hard on something. This should be followed by phases in which we can pay attention to the here and now without a goal. This gives us the opportunity to relax.

The answer is: both. We need phases in which we work hard on something. This should be followed by phases in which we can pay attention to the here and now without a goal. This gives us the opportunity to relax.

On the other hand, what you can easily do without are the negative time experiences. Reinterpreting boredom and seemingly lost time in a relaxing break helps you to rate the time as positive.

If you do not want to spend time with a whining child, look for an activity that you can concentrate on: telling stories, singing songs etc.

If you feel overwhelmed because you have planned too many activities, then shorten your to-do list.

It is up to you to find ways out of negative time experiences. It is important to realize that you are not at the mercy of time, but can consciously shape it.

Accept support

Did you think of everyday situations while reading? Do you have any ideas or questions about how to deal with it? I am pleased about your comment!

Children, how time flies – how you prevent your life from running away

Remembered time

So try to make room for new experiences.

Experience time

Time’s running

Time doesn’t want to go by

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