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" The bandage was wound around the wound.
" The farm was used to produce produce.
" The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse (British English).
" He could lead if he would get the lead out.
" The soldier decides to desert his dessert in the desert.
" Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
" A bass what painted on the head of the bass drum.
" When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
" I did not object to the object.
" There is a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
" They were too close to the door to close it.
" The buck does funny things when they are present.
" A seamstress and a hide down into a sewer line.
" To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
" The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
" After a number of injections, my jaw got number.
" I see you in the painting I shed a tear.
" I had to submit the subject to a series of tests.
" How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
Let’s face it – English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins were not invented in England nor French fries in France.
Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which are not sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers do not start grocers do not grouse and hammers do not ham? If the plural of teeth is teeth, why is not the plural of booth? One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices? Does not it seem that you can not make an annals of history? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? If teachers taught, why did not preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send by ship? Park on driveways and drive on parkways? Have not that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house burns down as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which alarm goes off on going on.
English what invented by people, computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, is not a race at all). That is why, when they are out, they are visible, they are visible, they are invisible? And why, when I wind up my watch, I start it, but when I wind up this essay, I end it? English is a silly language – it does not know if it is coming or going.
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