Raising children: 5 tips so that our children are not completely forgiven

by BUNTE.de Redaktion December 25, 2019 at 8:47 am

Raising children properly poses many parents facing challenges. With a few simple strategies, defiant kids become appreciative young people. We have the best tips for you so your children don’t completely be warped.

Do you know that? Does your child take gifts for granted and even grumble around? Surprises just elicit a tired smile? And the word "Thank you" is not necessarily part of his everyday vocabulary?

There is no question that raising children is not always easy. But if you know what is important when dealing with the offspring and the values that you want to convey, then you are well on the way to bringing up your child properly. We reveal five practical tips that you can use to ensure that your offspring do not become warped nerves.

Bribery is not a reward

Are you already rewarding or are you still bribing? There is a subtle difference here: when bribing, the child is offered the reward before the performance or a desired behavior. There is only a real reward afterwards – without the child knowing it beforehand. The problem is: Many parents use sweets or gifts to elicit behavior from their children. Understandable, because it gives you control over your offspring. Sentences like are typical "If you do that, you will get the game". If the performance fails to materialize, the punishment follows. Your child will not receive the announced reward.

Alfie Kohn, author and educational expert, warns in his book "The myth of the spoiled child" before this strategy in raising children. It leads directly into the corruption and punishment spiral. Because your child does not cooperate freely, but is encouraged to do so by the tempting reward. You cannot raise your child properly with this, because it does not learn insight. Instead, it learns how manipulation works. Kohn has better tips for bringing up children – you can help your children to be more valued and free themselves from the bribery trap.

No reward

Refrain from rewarding an achievement. If your child has done one thing really well, the great feeling is enough reward. This is the only way for your child to get to know and feel the joy of success. It can stay with itself and its joyful feeling without distraction in the form of a reward.

Appreciation

Be a role model and be respectful of other people and things – without any material attention. Appreciate yourself and your child and be thankful. This behavior will be remembered by your offspring.

Time Gifts

Don’t reward your child with things or money. Give him the most valuable thing you have: time to give him your appreciation and appreciation demonstrate. Spend great moments with a picnic, pillow fight or bike tour. No matter what – your child should have fun!

Bribery is not a reward

No reward

Appreciation

Time Gifts

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